i look to you

Okay, first off Beck told me how to do this... †
I think that is the coolest thing EVER...yep...coolest in the entire world!

Second of all, I must get this out of my system. Yesterday, Dallas and I were completely bored standing at the IT desk at the conference...so...he held up his walkie talkie and told me to say something. Out of a total loss of anything interesting to say, I paged for someone named Stephen to please come to the front desk. Of course, I did not think there was anyone named Stephen to show up. Little did I know, there was a guy named Stephen working. I did not make it clear what the FRONT DESK was, if you know Tacf, then you know that there is no 'front desk' in the bookstore, and the lobby desk just does not make any sense in that situation. So...Stephen, did I mention that he is pretty hard of hearing...came waltzing in the bookstore aimlessly, well, he had an aim i guess, to find whoever paged him. I was shocked, and laughing, and embarrassed. I just watched him walk around totally confused. He finally gave up, and walked to the front desk in the lobby...and when he saw nobody there, he waited at the window hoping to finally find whoever wanted him. I felt SO bad, and Dallas was laughing so hard, that I could not find it in me to tell him it was all a joke gone bad...sigh...sad story.

The Glory conference is not all that bad. The Riveras are here, and they are rocking. That lady does things with her voice that I think MUST be damaging, but they aren't. Nope. She just opens up and lets it out...one day Bethany, one day.

God is pretty cool hey. I love him. I get annoyed with him sometimes, but I love that it does not bug him. Sometimes I forget that he is not human. He does not have the same hurts as we do. When we don't talk to him, he does not love us any less. He does not forget about us, and he never stops waiting for us. I love...I just love.

I was talking to a very special friend of mine..Trishy...it was a good talk. I am writing it down so I don't forget about it. It is neat how just a couple words from a person you love give you so much life. I must have some sort of social love tank. Sometimes it gets near empty, until the right person says like one sentence, and then it is suddenly full again. Yep. Trish is one of those people. There is SO much power in words. Did I mention my love for God.

I hate that friendship is a season. blah to that.

HAHA. i just did spell check, and Trishy came up as TRASHY...oh...the humors of life

bye guys!

a script

a conversation i had

Dallas: hey bethany, how nice of you to eat my coffee crisp!

Bethany: how do you know I ate your coffee crisp?

D: cuz i saw crumbs of it on your lips, and everytime you laughed chunks of it flew out of your mouth, and it smelled like coffee!

Jimmy: I can't believe you lied in church. Hey, how old are you? Oh wait, you should never ask a woman for her age.

D: I am 18 and handsome.

J: When I 19, you were 7. I went on my first missions trip. I ate moose meat. I love quebec. My wife speaks french so she can translate for me!

B: I hate this shift key!

Mark: Say my name, say my name. When noone is around you....lalalala

Beck: WHAT? Can't hear you! Your mom is a sticky toad frog. They have trouble attatching themself to flying mokeys.

D: or flying ukrainians

Beck: or flying ukrainians

D: on the shirt it says slava

M: is this your blog?

D: Slava means praise

M: you are all tosta zhopa

B: what does that mean?

D: i don't know (laugh)...dal says...what the heck? Yeah, no..tebya kraseevoyeh nogee. yes. And then BETHANY SAYS ya zhnayoo.

B: i touched dallas' bum.


Anyway, that is it now. I THINK THAT SHOULD explain exactly how my day was. also, the shift key is spontaneously combusting.

bye

miscellaneous babble

hello friends of the bloging community and others,
today, i write to inform you on the happenings of my life today thus far.

1. wake up
2. call beth
3. drive to beth's
4. drive home
5. drink tea
6. eat oreos
7. drive to church
8. drive home
9. chat with annie
10. watch tv
11. write blog
12. still pending

so, as you can see, i have had a quite eventful day. i feel a deep need to relax, and build up some energy for my next excursion into the world.

i saw trish and peter yesterday. they are a wonderful couple, full of humors and serious chats. i have not used capitals this entire blog. it is so unlike myself. i have also discovered something wonderful about blogs, spell check. so i no longer have to write about how i have spelled a million things wrong. what a blissful discovery.

i hope you all find yourselves well. beck just walked in, she does not understand why i write about nothing. i write down everything i see, and i see everything i can. gully says, if i want to be a writter, i'd better start now. which is why, i am a spy. i believe that is taken from harriot the spy. i used to love that movie. now i do not, cuz it is quite young for my taste. it is weird how our brain has taste...or maybe it doesn't.

i miss sarah. she is funny. she will probably comment on this line, which will make me smile. the other sarah who i see frequently is quite neat as well.

oh gosh, i wish i had something really good to say. i wish that there was something, anything, worth talking about. this season is just so blah for me. oh well, it shall improve itself.

okay, enough from me.
talk to you soon friends.

flowers and daisies.

The killers is only one month away! I just can't wait. Well, actually I can. I just do not want to. Today I went to the science centre. It was an experience. I will tell you about it later. I'm leaving for now. Buy


some chocolate for me
by

the way, I love Jesus
bye

to bored, or not to bored?!

I think I will stop myself from admitting to boredom from now on. It is kind of like giving up, giving in to the nothingness. The second you verbally announce that you are bored, it intesefies like a million times, and suddenly, you are stuck. Stuck with nothing. Then you find yourself saying over and over and over how bored you are, and NOTHING seems to pull you out. It is only after you make a decision to deal with it and move on that you realize, wow, I am not as bored as I thought I was!

Today, I was bored. I spent the morning watching CSI, which I LOVE...d. It is definitely an evening show. I then straightened what some would call hair. It was a mess...never should you wash your hair and sleep on it. Unless, of course, your hair is only a couple inches. Mine is not! Not only did it screw my hair over the next day, but the sopping wet pillow was unable to fufill its sole purpose. The comfort was NOT there. I think I even had to shake water out of my ear the next morning. Okay...Exaggeration admitted.

After the battle with the hair, I left to go to church. Sigh...church. I love it, but I dislike going into work with no aim for the day. It is not even my job. You see, Beck, who I love, works there. I do not have a job at the moment, and rather than sit on my ass all day at home...I sit on my ass at church. I could justify it if I had the energy, but I do not. Yes I do. Okay, I used to watch tv like a mad woman, but then I realized it was a HUGE waste of time. So I would far rather spend time thinking, and writing, and reading, and socializing! It feels so almish. I have a feeling I spelled that wrong, but alas, I could care less. But wait, if you could care less, does that not mean that you DO care a bit. Hmmm...

I tried to write a sermon yesterday. It was SO hard. I want to be taken seriously, but A. what do I have to say that people have not heard before, and B. I just can't seem to not be silly. I was reading a book today called 'Lucas on Life 2' and I was laughing SO hard. This guy is a pastor, author, teacher guy. He writes all these ridiculous stories about his life, and how he found God in them. In one of his short stories he talked about this man who wrote him an anonymous letter about how he SUCKED as a preacher cuz he was too funny. 'you are not a pastor, you are a comedian. You have missed your calling.' was one of the lines in his hate male...i mean mail.
Lucas just said that when things like that happen, you just have to shrug them off, cuz you know what God made you to do. And we live for Him, not man. I liked it. The other stories were quite hilarious as well. Sigh...there is just to much to share. But y'all should go ahead and read it. Especially if you are the non-religious type.

I had a dream (sister to the better known I have a dream speech)
My dream was symbolic. I knew that from the time I awoke. But I just did not know the interpretation. I talked it over with a gal named Sarah...oops...maybe I should change her name...okay...FRAN. I talked it over with a gal named Fran. She suggested that I have a lack of vulnerability. I was kinda taken back. I live my life like an open book (i think), so I was confused. But then I realized that she is probably right. When I tell people stuff, I am pretty sure I guard my heart. There are a few people who I let into the courts of myself, and the things that they say really hit me... but most people, I just could care less what they have to say about me. Does that even make sense? I guess I don't really understand what it means to be vulnerable. Maybe I am, I just don't know.

Anyway, let us stray from that. I want to have an open house for kids and youth whenever it is I have a house of my own. I think that would be so fun. I mean, a place where hurting kids can come and just hang out. I don't know what that will look like or anything, and I don't know if I could even handle it, it is just an idea. I shall chat it over with my futureness whenever he shows up. Perhaps he will have a few idears.

Most of my friends are in relationships...and the ones who are not are content, at least on the outside. Interesting. The season is changing. I don't know where that came from...just started typing, and that is what came out. It is my mind barf...like it?

One more thing, I need to clean my room. Not physically, I cleaned yesterday, but more...internally. I think it is just that I am growing up or something, but I just want to...grow up. I want to still be me...totally...but I want to be 'on fire' if you will. I know I hear God, I know that I know that I know that I hear God. Sometimes he tells me to do things or say things to people, and I totally shut him right up. It feels so immature to me. I want to be able to just forget about myself, and my issues that might get in the way of my ministry...I want to trust that God can work beyond that.

Crap. I have to go.

daniel

i have changed my password daniel. the gig is up...it is SO up!

bye

death to person mysterious

Umm...I have a hacker. There is one. Yep. It is quite sad. You think you know people, until. I hope it was Bethany, she knows my password. It may not have been, because everyone (as in annie and daniel) knows that my password always has something to do with my poochy. I feel violated. I feel angry. I feel cold. I feel revenge.

I have no way of getting that though. I do not know anyone elses password. I am not the type of person to wiggle my way into another persons personal life. Only SAD people do that. Really really sad people. I will pray for you...whoever you are. It was and is still quite funny.

In other more greener pastures. I am going to write a sermon today. I am not sure what it will look like. I hope it is wonderful, and enlightening. I think I will write it on love, and flowers. They relate.

Laura Wildgoose, I love her. I know she loves me too, she would NEVER change my profile. She accepted me as I was before. And still...she accepts me.

What?

God is great. I love him. I think he loves me way more than I give him credit for. I know he likes me. Here is something I wonder...does God laugh at sarcasm. It is possible, but I have a feeling he sees right through it, and while everyone else is laughing, he is crying cuz he sees the truth and hurt behind it. Interesting.

I like cheese. I really do. It is not a lie. Also chocoalte milk. I may or may not be drinking it right now.

I hate job hunting. There is nothing to aim for and my bow and arrow are getting heavy. I think I will drop them, and hope that a job just dies right in front of me so I can take it home and chop it up and eat it. What a wonderful analagy. Did I spell that right? Who cares!?

Okay, I am leaving now. I forgive the culprit. I am not changing my password. I like it too much. It is simple. Why should I suffer for someone elses wrong doing? That would make me more Christlike though...maybe I will.

leg hair

leg hair is so soft and i like to run my fingers through it!!!

eating soggy chips

Sigh, I have not eaten much today, nope. I did not eat anything soggy for sure. I am not quite sure why I have soggy chips as a title for this blog. Not sure at all actually. Beck, she is beside me now...creating a quiz. You all should go take it. She has a bebo...not a blog, which is quite sad. How will she join the brother/sisterhood of bloggers within the Tacf church family. It is impossible. Maybe I will be the builder of the bridge that brings beboers and bloggers together...yes...

beckpoulsen.bebo.com

go there instantly and allow beck in. WAIT!!! Finish reading this first.

Okay, I am bored. How entertaining. Yes. Entertaining.

oh yeah, if you want to get some more great reading material go to

notorphanannie.blogspot.com

I hope that is the right address, I believe it is. Yep. Annie mal, deep intellectual type. Also funny as shit.

Okay, I can't think of anyone else to up talk at the moment. If I start allowing myself the list will be far to great to comprehend. Yes, it will. I am so stinking tired. I woke up at noon, but I went to bed at four. I can understand the lack of sympathy from EVERYONE. Ish.

What am I talking about, this is definaly word barf. I miss my friends, I had so many, but then I got lazy. So lazy. I hate it when I do that. I get to selective, and then drop friends like the plague. No...not like a plague. I just have seasonal taste i guess. But it is a two way street i guess. I don't even make sense right now.

Wow, the lady singing right now REALLY wants to be heard.
common woman, you can hit those high notes...you sure can try.

Rude. Kinda

I am just running out of things to say. I will have more interesting things to say soon. I shall leave instantly!

kids that nap

The art of kidnaping is one that I do not possess. Yeah, as if that made any sense. Bethany Elaine Ventura is super sick, although she would NEVER admit to it. She is. She is sick physically and mentally, but my concern lies with the latter.

Speaking of latter, Ladder 49 was a great movie.

Anyway, we (being Rebecca Elizabeth Poulen and I) kidnaped Bethany due to her sickness. We have taken her under house arrest. If we don't make her rest, goodness knows she will not.

Movin' right along. Sleep. It is difficult to accomplish on a floor. I am not sure why, the pillow just does not take the form I desire, and the carpet scratches through clothing...and it just makes for an all in all sleep disaster. Dreams don't help. Dreams that are weird and somewhat creepy. Like the dream I had last night involving the shooting of an arrow through my fathers head by the villiage culprits. Yes...the monsters from 'The Village'. Some (Annie Louise Matheson) would call it their favourite movie.

Lord, I pray for Annie. Would you download movie taste to here immediatly. It is a need

Amen.

I have friends, and some of them went to a Jimmy concert. It was great! So I hear. The invitations was not handed to me. So I did not go. Sigh. Oh Jimmy, whatever did you do without me there for inspiration. Oh, I see. Perhaps it would have been more distracting than beneficial.

I like church. I am learning to love church. I am forming a new definition of church. I am not sure what that is yet. I hope she gets better soon. She has been sick forever.

Bethany is sick.

I'm sick too, in my own right. I'm sick of romantic comedies and the impossiblilities it plants in my fragile, female, complex, maluable mind. Love is not a feeling. Hunger is one, though. It is rising like the flaming red hot sun on the Sahara.

How is everyone. I feel like I have not seen most of my friends for months, but that is just not true. What is true? Well, I have not have QT with any of them for a long time, which SUCKS!

My besteses are watching You've Got Mail. Puke. Barf. Ralph. Whatever you call it, it is all the same to me. Meg and Tom are a pleasant couple, a pleasantly sickening couple. And romantic comedies are created to make dateless people even more aware of their lonely state. I am not lonley, I am in denial. WHAT?

Okay, I have up chucked uselessness long enough.

There is a love, even though it is cliche, it is truth.

Also, Bethany, not I, did that last blog. There is NO WAY I could come with something that brilliant. Sigh....

One day.

rub your tummy and pat your head

Most of you know that I'm, well, musically inclined to say the least. I would like to share with you my latest piece of genius. Partake, if you will...

the grass was greener on Paula's side
until I saw my side clearer
unfertilized it was, my dear
but so delightful, so delightful
my favorite colour used to be blue but
then my life changed,
those deliverance sessions were not in vain
now it's red, how peculiar
but in five minutes it will be yellow
because I need to learn to love those
things I used to hate (I scream real crazy at this part)
I like things wrapped in aluminum,
I prefer them to diamonds and the finest silk ( a little harmony there)
if I wanted this to rhyme, I'd say something clever about milk (a backround cackle)
but back to you, you're not off the hook
I hope you find your car keys
because I couldn't bear to drive you home...
you talk too much about the frivilous
everything is so frivilous

I plan to just run off stage like Napoleon, even though I thrive off applause. I'll sacrafice it. I'm better than that. It's also in the key of F sharp junior delux.
We ordered pizza to TACF last night and Martin ate practically the WHOLE THING. Bethany V only got a meezly pepperoni! There's injustice for you.
Bradd Pitt is actually quite old. He probably eats EVERYTHING organic and uses oil of olay.
I'm not going to lie and say it's not on my shopping list. Mind your own business.

I love you all so very much. Please feel free to leave any compliments in the comments section.
Bethany Dawn Critchley

a circle of friends

Hello again,

Goodness gracious, it has been a very emotional day. Yes, it has been. I guess it doesn't help that I have been sickly ill..which is a redundant phrase...or couple of words, or something. I am finding it very difficult to love my brother, maybe that is why Jesus kept saying how important it is to do it. If it was easy, there would be no point in making a big deal of it. Sigh...brothers. People tell me all the time it is just a phase, but sometimes it just does not feel that way. I really hope it is, cuz I am not the type of person who handles enemies too well. Oops, personal.

How rude. Is that a question? How wonderful. Is that a question. How wonderful you are! Is that a question?
Oh the questions.

I am listening to that band...you know, the one called...uhh...shoot, I forget. I think it has the word stone in it. OH YEAH...capstone. Yeah, I am pretty proud of myself for getting that one. Capstone, they are an interesting time that is for sure. I can never figure out how I feel about them exactly. I think I like them, but then I just get bugged and change the song. But I always run back for more. Kind of like cotton candy ice cream. Or is it iced cream?!?!

Blossom is barking. She was sick all morning, maybe I cought what she had, but I don't think you can catch sickness from dogs. I wonder if that is true! Tomorrow I am moving back to the Poulsens, good times and a half. I am doing a skit at Just Me and the Kids, which should BLOW big time...haha. Oh well, I get the play the 'special bird', which is not a far stretch from reality. I feel like eating some popsicles. mmmm...

Trish Henderson...oops, last names...oh well...Trish rocks lots. Here is a poem I wrote for her:

Trish is so great
she really really is
when she says hi
i realize i miss
it when she is there
and another thing
she has great hair
she likes food
and says cool jokes
when she is in a bad mood
she is no fun to poke
wait, yes she is so
especially in the snow

WOW. I shall not quit my non existant day job! But i do love her, and she is great. So there. She was at church on tuesday, and she did not even say hi! BOO

I could probably link all my friends back to trish...let me try:

dating peter who hangs with dan, who lives in same town as annie and maryanne and jordan, who knows jill weber, who knows beck, who is also bestest with bethany, who is dating mark, who knows pudd, who knows a bunch of tacf friends, who know a bunch of school of ministry friends...who know...?

oh gosh, i think i failed and succeeded at the same time. Oh well. It is neat that I tried. It is also grammatically needy.

I believe I have run out of things to say. so i shall leave. but not for long. bye

time well wasted

Wow, I can change the font of my bloggy blog blog! That is so exciting hey?! . Oki doke, I noticed on my last blog that I posted twice...TWICE...and I am glad. It is nice to know that you have been heard. It would have been nicer to see the looks on peoples face as they read them. The reaction would be splendiforus.

I should talk about my road trip...we had air time. It was great. Superman has nothing on us. We spent five hours of singing the Friends theme song in a Midas waiting room. Wow. What a trip!

I am eating peanut butter and jam from a spoon. It is interesting. But then again...so am I. Or so is myself? Bethany (the other one) is supposed to come and free me from my boredom at this moment. Actually, 23 moments ago. Whatever, I can deal. Some people would tell me that boredom is a state of mind...and I must make a choice to preoccupy myself. Others would say that is a load of shhhh....it is not up to me to say what other people would say. It is up to myself. Damn right...or wrong?

What deep thoughts have I been thinking? Well, non that I can share openly with y'all. You should ask about it sometime. Also, I moved. I am living in T. O. now. So I shall be blogging less regularily. I hope that is okay with you plural.

mmmm...peanut butter.

I wonder, who do I know here right now. Noone, all strangers. Oh well. Also, I am going to talk to some homeless people next week. Yep. Just sit with them on the street and talk about nothingness. It shall be entertaining enough. I figure Jesus would have done it.

Sorry about all the many grammatical errors. It is due to a lack of schooling. My bad. You can deal. Like that for instance was NOT a complete sentance.

K.

I need to leave now, cuz I have nothing else to say. or type. or think.

Sienara Peeps Yo.